


Rip Me In Two

by demigodklance



Category: Hemlock Grove
Genre: Angst, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Pining, Suicidal Thoughts, but he loves roman a lot even tho roman doesnt know that, idk whats going on in peters head i dont relate to him as much, roman just wants to be loved tbh
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-10
Updated: 2017-10-10
Packaged: 2019-01-15 17:17:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 590
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12325404
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/demigodklance/pseuds/demigodklance
Summary: The first time he kissed Peter, he was the one being ripped in two, shedding himself and becoming something knew.The first time Peter was inside him he knew there was no going back, he would be the best part of him forever. He felt like he was finally alive and like he was dying at the same time, but if it was Peter who killed him he didn’t think he would mind.





	Rip Me In Two

The first time Roman saw Peter turn he felt like he was the one being torn apart. Peter was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen and he made him feel something for the first time. Since as long as he could remember he’d been empty, waiting for something to happen to come and fill him, make him feel human.

  
The first time he kissed Peter, he was the one being ripped in two, shedding himself and becoming something knew.

  
The first time Peter was inside him he knew there was no going back, he would be the best part of him forever. He felt like he was finally alive and like he was dying at the same time, but if it was Peter who killed him he didn’t think he would mind.

  
Peter was everything he didn’t know he wanted, everything he needed and everything he needed to stay away from. He was everything Roman had never liked in a person before, he was rough and gentle, he was stubborn, and he would do anything for the people he cared about. Peter lit a fire inside him he never knew was there.

  
Roman had never loved anyone like he loved Peter, he wasn’t sure he had even loved anyone till he met Peter. He wanted to be inside him, all around him, next to him. Every second. Wanted Peter to feel the same way, wanted Peter to look at him like he would drown without him there. The way Roman looked at him. He wanted Peter to rip him open and crawl inside, rearrange him and make something better. Something good enough. Wanted Peter to tell him everything was okay, that it wasn’t a big deal; liking a boy, that it would be okay, it would work, he’d always be there.

  
Peter was all he thought of now, he didn’t know what else to think about without feeling lost, Peter was something he would hold onto. If it killed them both. He wouldn’t let go, he’d hold on to him like a python, wouldn’t let him leave.

  
When he layed in bed at night, trying to slip into sleep, always with no luck, he’d find his hand traveling down his body, touching himself how he wanted to be touched by Peter.

  
He hated Peter, sometimes almost as much as he loved him. Hated him for not loving him back, for not doing anything to alleviate the crushing weight on his chest. The weight that told him he was nothing, he was disgusting, dirty, not worth Peter’s time. The weight that told him Peter knew how he felt but chose to ignore it, chose to let him suffer in silence. Peter was a fucking coward, a selfish cunt.

  
He gave Roman another reason to want to gut himself like a fish, it was what he deserved anyways, he wasn’t worthy of even living in the same world as someone as ethereal as Peter.

  
Peter made him feel just as safe as he did confused, made him feel like he was here for Peter, not for himself or any other reason, just the person he would die for, kill for, do anything for.

  
The first time Peter told him he loved him he cried into his chest for what felt like hours, Peter’s hand in his hair felt like heaven, or whatever existed that was close enough to it. Whatever it was it was Peter. Holding him and putting him together all at the same time he ripped him apart.

**Author's Note:**

> a fun game would be to slap me for every time i repeat Peter in this because apparently i hate adjectives


End file.
